Wednesday, July 07, 2004

The Ultimate Bag-n-Straw Conversation

Ever since we moved offices, I get my breakfast from the cafeteria in the building. Truth be told, I miss the awful bagels and muffins and croissants I used to get from the Indian guys downstairs. They were cool, they always flashed me a smile and gave me a friendly welcome to the day. Now it's just corporate breakfast. I'm convinced the Indians know how to do breakfast. Isn't that a little bit racist? How can it be racist, if I complimented them on their breakfast skills? That's ridicurous.

My favorite brief, random conversation came with one of these convenience store clerks, back when I worked on Wall Street in the Trump Building (wait, I worked on Wall Street?). One day, February 6, 2002, (I have it documented in an e-mail to some friends) this conversation got out of hand...here's that e-mail:

"Actual conversation this morning with the guy who I buy the paper and a drink from in the morning went like this...keep in mind that this guy sounds like the 'what are you doooooing?' guy except a little more Indian.

Him: You need a bag or a straw buddy?
Me: Nah, I'm good.
Him: OK. (brief pause) Bag then?
Me: Nah.
Him: Straw then?
Me: Nah I'm good.
Him: OK. (brief pause) So, no bag, no straw buddy?"

Man, I love that conversation. I think about it all the time. Maybe that makes me kinda weird or insane, but I just loves the way it unfolds. The guy was practically begging me to take the bag, or at least the straw, please man for the love of God let me help you transport your purchased goods upstairs or at least let me help you drink that drink with the use of this awesome straw. Doesn't get better than that. No it doesn't.

Hopefully Donnie makes a re-appearance today with a story about the Greeks winning the Euro2004 extravaganza, but we'll just have to hold our breath. In the meantime, go fuck yourselves.

8 Comments:

At 8:42 AM, Blogger Terri said...

Where's the good stuff about work?

 
At 8:51 AM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

This is a "no work" zone. But thanks for asking...

 
At 9:15 AM, Blogger Seyeko said...

you racist motherfrucker.

I bet you think all indians bathe in curry powder before their tri-daily cow worshipping ceremonies.Go eat your bagel cracka!

 
At 10:40 AM, Blogger misterlister said...

Free Tassone!!
http://www.nytimes.com/2004/07/07/nyregion/07ROSL.html

 
At 10:40 AM, Blogger misterlister said...

Free Tassone!!
http://www.nytimes.com/2004/07/07/nyregion/07ROSL.html

 
At 10:50 AM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Free him twice? Roslyn sucks.

 
At 11:10 AM, Blogger Seyeko said...

And here I thought Tassone was some delicious and tasty snack cake that I'd get to try out for free.

Bastard!

 
At 12:03 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Free Tibet? I'll take it.

China, I have something I think you might want.

 

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