Monday, August 30, 2004

RNC Here, No Pudding

Holy Habeas Corpus! What's going on in this fair city of ours? Irene and I were strolling around the quaint East Village on Friday night and all hell was breaking loose. It was like walking off a great Basra or Sarajevo or Cleveland. At one point, someone from Kosovo came up to us and said, "Thees nothing. You shoulda see a my country...". Just then, an anti-Bush protestor blew up a horse by ghost-riding his plastique-laced protest-Huffy into it. Then Vladnitz said, "OK, that was a sometheeng," as he wiped bits of blood-stained mane from his head.

It felt like we were walking through a reality theater performance of Pink Floyd's "Another Brick in the Wall" what with the crazy helicopter noises and the faint protests echoing down 2nd Avenue and old men chasing around kids with meat. I tried to tell my coke dealer about the helicopters but he didn't believe me. When we finally stopped by his place, he offered to show Irene helicopters. She declined, saying, "I've seen enough helicopters for one day." But really, a chopper floating over previously innocuous things like Mermaid Inn, the Ukrainian Cultural Home and the (thankfully untouched) Russian and Turkish Baths was really freaky, what with the light beaming down on the biking protesters and everything. Luckily, we just drank our way through it and everything died down.

And, as I've always predicted, a big green dragon set itself on fire on Sunday outside Madison Square Garden. I've been warning the government for years about Steamlock and he finally reared his ugly, fiery head.


At 3:41 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

"Let's protest, man."
"OK, you got a sign?"
"Yeah, but let's burn a flag instead."
"No, even better, let's burn a dragon."
"Bong hits?"


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