Friday, October 15, 2004

Special Friday Evening Before Going Out Post

I have no idea why anyone would be watching CNN's Crossfire at 4:30 on a Friday, but those lucky souls that did were treated to a truly bizarre and surreal moment on live television. I, for one, could not believe what I was watching, and even find it difficult to recount the story without showing the visual scene. I'm not entirely sure if right wing nut-job Tucker Carlson and all-forehead lefty Paul Begala knew what they were getting into or not, but Jon Stewart laid an absolute ass-whooping on these guys today. After the first, say, 90 seconds or so, when he was friendly and made a joke or two, Stewart was as serious as a heart attack for the rest of the show, never really even cracking a smile in his remaining 14 minutes on the show.

He made it about 90 seconds and then threw this out there: "And I made a special effort to come on the show today, because I have privately, amongst my friends and also in occasional newspapers and television shows, mentioned this show as being bad...And I wanted to -- I felt that that wasn't fair and I should come here and tell you that I don't -- it's not so much that it's bad, as it's hurting America."

Stewart never raised his voice, and in fact, was very monotonous. It was almost like he was unexpectedly breaking up with his wife, just like avoiding eye contact and speaking real softly. He even delivered his jokes in a manner similar to that of Steven Wright. He accused the Crossfire hosts of engaging in theater rather than debate and said of their show: "It's not honest. What you do is not honest. What you do is partisan hackery."

It all led up to the following exchange (and keep in mind you're watching CNN's main political show Crossfire):

CARLSON: I do think you're more fun on your show. Just my opinion.

(Tucker looks to camera to throw it to commerical)

CARLSON: OK, up next, Jon Stewart goes one on one with his fans...

STEWART: You know what's interesting, though? You're as big a dick on your show as you are on any show.

I don't know how you'd go about getting a copy of this online, but if your savvy using the World Wide Web, the information superhighway if you will, try to locate of copy of this. But click here for a full transcript of the show (and anywhere it says "LAUGHTER," that should read 'VERY NERVOUS AND AWKWARD LAUGHTER"). Just an absolutely ridiculous and riveting 15 minutes of television.

LATE ADDITION **Thanks to an Anonymous poster, we have some video. Click here.**

On another note, heavy rains just forced Major League Baseball to cancel tonight's contest featuring the Yankees and Red Sawx. So Fox has to kill a few hours obviously, and they make the predictable and correct decision to show a movie in the game's stead. Fox's parent company, News Corporation -- the Rupert Murdoch-owned global media empire -- owns the following film studios and companies: Twentieth Century Fox, Twentieth Century Fox International Twentieth Century Fox Television, Fox Searchlight Pictures, Fox Television Studios, Fox Studios Los Angeles, Fox Movie Channel, not to mention hundreds of cable and local television stations and channels around the world.

Out of all those film assets, what movie do you think they decided to air instead of the postponed game? My first guess was See Spot Run, the 2001 comedy classic starring David Arquette and Michael Clarke Duncan about "a mailman takes care of a dog that, unbeknownst to him, is an FBI drug-sniffing superdog that has escaped from the witness protection program after becoming the target of an assassination." And you know what, I was 100 percent right. This is now reason number 134 why Fox is worse than a javelin to the groin (employing Tim McCarver is reason number 14 if you were wondering).


At 10:18 PM, Blogger Wooglin said...

It's right on the bottom of the transcript Ace:


At 12:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can get the video here:

At 3:14 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Excellent work on supplying the link, Anon. poster. Much gratitude.

At 8:03 PM, Blogger paulsepp said...

Great blog! I just watched the video and it was awesome.

At 3:37 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Thanks PaulSepp...appreciate that. Come back any time, ya hear.


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