Friday, December 17, 2004

A Box of Craisins

SAN ANTONIO -- The City Council on Friday approved an ordinance requiring strippers to wear their permits while they are on stage. City Councilman Chip Haass pushed the measure, adopted unanimously by the 11-member council, as a way to make it easier for police to identify dancers.

But Jim Deegear, a lawyer for several strip clubs in the city, said it would put strippers in danger by making it easier for an obsessed customer to find out a dancer's real name and where she lives. He said the measure is part of an effort to drive strip clubs out of business, and he said he will fight it in court.

Wait, what? Is that for real? Are the police in San Antonio routinely walking into strip clubs and wondering which ones the dancers are? Because if that's the case, I think it might be best to repeal this law and replace the police force with a group of folks who aren't complete retards. I work with retards.

Officer 1: Hey, Callahan, this one's naked over here, but I'm really not sure if she's a stripper or not.
Officer 2: Well, McClaskey, does she have a permit or not?
Officer 1: Oh, yeah, there it is, she just snatched her permit out of some guy's mouth with her labia.
Officer 2: Maybe we should take her in.
Officer 1: I think I'm in love.
Officer 2: I was in love once...with my cousin.
Officer 1: That's weird.
Officer 2: She's dead.
Officer 1: That's cool.

9 Comments:

At 3:16 PM, Blogger ethan said...

wait, they keep them in cages?

 
At 3:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

We've passed this refrigerator FOUR TIMES already!!

 
At 3:49 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Yes! Fuck yes!

Ethan, your pick-up is noted and appreciated, but our Anon. poster has the key to my heart...only two people I know in the world can pick up on that "love with my cousin" bit, and they're better men for it. Evan, that's gotta be you, so you win the dynamite drop-in award of the day.

Long live The State.

 
At 3:59 PM, Blogger poophopanonymous22 said...

damn it, i thought u were using the "my mother grabbed me once...once" bit, name that bit??? love that movie

 
At 4:40 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Johnny Dangerously, baby...scoop of chocolate, scoop of vanilla, don't waste my time. Love that flick (JD, not City Slickers...well, I like that one too).

 
At 4:40 PM, Blogger Gypsy Rose said...

Johnny Dangerously! And don't say I'm to old to chime in. "The lower east side really sucks!"

 
At 4:44 PM, Blogger Gypsy Rose said...

Jinx. You owe me a coke.

"Hey, then you ain't gettin' no coke." Name it? Anybody?

 
At 5:27 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

The Shack of Caddies...man, we're gettin' too easy.

What's that sign say? No bare feet.

 
At 6:10 PM, Blogger poophopanonymous22 said...

farging iceholes, any fargin bastages still at work, or is that just me? FARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

 

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