Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Boo-urns

Auburn who? Well, I still think Auburn deserved to be in that championship game over Oklahoma, but that's a moot point now. For some reason, despite not liking or disliking either team more than the other, I thoroughly enjoyed that thrashing last night. It was actually fun to watch, right down to the last quarter.

The halftime show, however, now that was painful. Why do the networks and leagues insist on putting on these extravagant halftime shows that nobody gives a shit about? The only way I'm gettin' into a halftime show is if I see some black areolae and a gyrating Timberlakian pelvis. As for last night's show, I wasn't paying much attention until the very end, but I did catch the worst performance of any entertainer on a public stage in the history of music. Don't mean to get all Bill Walton on you, but it's true. The hiiiissssstoooorrrryyy of music.

I don't want to pick on Ashlee Simpson too much, because everyone already knows she blows more goats than Noah Vanderhoff, but that performance was just atrocious. It's over for her. It's gotta be over for her. Lip synching would have worked better than that garbage. She deserved to be booed mercilessly, and thankfully she was. As Mama Winslow would say, "Way to go, Carl."

6 Comments:

At 11:51 AM, Blogger ethan said...

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At 11:52 AM, Blogger ethan said...

that halftime routine had me snorting like urkel (nice family matters ref).

 
At 12:10 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

"Way to go, Carl" has always been a Donnie Fiedler/Ace Cowboy favorite...and since Donnie died in a horrific Bobst Library balcony jump (OK, that's wrong), I figured I'd let his legacy of Winslow-lovin' live in.

I don't get the halftime show thing...I mean, I understand it's to bring in the non-football fans and spouses and shit, but why the hell does it have to be Kelly Clarkson and John Stamos' older brother Richard? Makes no sense to me.

Very psyched about Tino by the way, as per your blog post this morning...just hope he's got a little gas in that tank.

 
At 12:28 PM, Blogger ethan said...

are you sure you wouldn't rather go with tony clark?

this is a huge upgrade, and the short porch in right should help tino hit at least 15 jacks in part time duty. and if/when giambi falters, you won't be seeing many 4 k games. god, all those tony the tiger whiffs in the alcs are still haunting me...

also, ashlee simpson's tv equivalent would have to be any made-for-tv movie put out by the sci-fi channel.

 
At 12:39 PM, Blogger poophopanonymous22 said...

ashlee simpson bashing alert!!!! i want simon cowell to critique ashlee's performance last night, i imagine dreadful being part of it. i mean, as we all saw last night, she clearly cant sing, she isnt attractive, and as we saw on SNL, she cant dance either, so basically, i jsut described myself, and i have a straighter nose. shit, screw this working stuff, i am off to Clive Davis' office to ink a record deal

 
At 12:44 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

That's fuckin' hysterical, poophop...

Kudos bar for you.

 

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