Friday, July 15, 2005

Coach Downs Syndrome

This article is too good, so I'll just put it up without comment (I will, however, italicize my favorite parts):

Cops: Little League Coach Takes 'Hit' On Player

NORTH UNION TOWNSHIP, Pa. -- A tee-ball coach seeking to keep a player with a mental disability off the field allegedly asked another player to hurt the boy, state police in Fayette County said Friday.

During pre-game warmups, Mark Reed Downs Jr. offered one of his players $25 to hit the 8-year-old boy in the head with a baseball, according to a police news release.

"Various interviews revealed that Downs did not want the victim to play due to his physical limitations," the release said.

After speaking with his coach, the second player hit the victim near his left ear and in the groin area, leaving him unable to play in that night's game, police said.

The alleged incident happened June 27 at R.W. Clark Little League Field in North Union Township, police said.

Downs, 27, of Dunbar, was charged Friday with criminal solicitation to commit aggravated assault, corruption of minors and reckless endangerment. He posted bond and was released from jail.

A preliminary hearing is scheduled for July 28.


At 4:05 PM, Blogger Matty Mac said...

you left out the part that said:

"after hitting the boy in the groin, he was still able to say 'would you like fries with that' successfully, albeit with a slightly higher voice. He was also able to find his baseball."

At 5:03 PM, Anonymous John Howard said...

That's about the most disgusting thing I've heard since...well, since yesterday when that guy killed his son to cure his gayness.

At 5:57 PM, Blogger ahren said...

in college, the coach used to offer me $25 to slam ethan with a bat before games, in an attempt to keep him off the field, because of his mental disability.

ethan like it too. i told him it was a "game" and that it was "fun," and he bought it. never kept him off the field though.

i'm not making (most of) this up.

At 3:41 PM, Blogger Gypsy Rose said...

Not to be overly dramatic, but this is one of those "little stories" that sends me into one of my... people are bad / humans are evil / I'm very afraid for the human race... spirals.

At 8:45 AM, Blogger Kenny Alias said...

personally, i'm with the coach on this one. that poor goofy bastard probably wasn't very good and I'm sure it was an important game. i mean this coach is out there, taking time off work to teach kids how to play tee-ball and here comes this retard, drooling on the ball, running from homeplate to third, fucking up the batting order, etc. the only logical thing to do in that situation is to sweep the leg. Cobra Kai style.

At 9:15 AM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

No mercy, Alias. No mercy.

It's quite fun to joke about mongoloids, but I'm with Gypsy on this one. Although, Ahren's story's pretty funny, too. OK, I relent, slow children deserve it.


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