Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Yankees Notes in Real Time

O's at Yanks, Game 2 of a two-game set:

1. Jason Giambi continues to rip it up! Best. Player. Ever. In the second inning he hit his third homerun in the past two games, the first time he's done that since 2001. In the third he ripped a two-RBI double into the gap and another double in the sixth. I think he's pulled his average up to .147 (actually it's a more than respectable .266 -- for him, at this point, I'll take it).

2. Randy Johnson threw an unintentional eephus pitch in the third inning. I think Flaherty tried to call time but it wasn't granted and the Unit just threw one up there. Not only that, but like Conan O'Brien in the presence of Terence and Philip for a screening of Asses of Fire, he laughed. He actually smiled on the mound for the first time since Little League. And for all you Henry Rowengartner fans out there, "I haven't seen the floater pitch since Scuffy McGeeee."

Incidentally, Unit's Unintentional Eephus is a great band name.

3. As the hit parade continued through the third inning, Tony Womack struck out for the second time in two innings. Seriously, Joe, I'd rather you play Mel Stottlemyre than Womack. I mean, Mel's not helping the pitching staff, so he might as well bat for Womack. Let Womack fuck up the pitchers, let Mel strike out. And check this out: the well-respected Tom Verducci wrote this gem of an article about Womack: "Yankees have a hitter more useless than Giambi." Here are some more frightening Womack stats from Larry Mahnken.

Womack just followed up those strikeouts with a very nice double-play ball. If you're counting at home, he made four of the Yankees' first 12 outs in a 12-3 game.

*Update: Infield single for Womack! I totally forgot what he looked like on the base paths!

4. My assistant tried to tell me an important statistic about union employees losing their jobs to outsourcing, only Derek Jeter was caught in a rundown. I didn't even hide the fact that I wasn't listening, yelling, "Go Derek" and "Alllllright" when the O's fucked it up big time. And fuck it up big time, they did. The O's are dunzo for the year, with a capital D (although I didn't capitalize it there).

5. I don't think Rodrigo Lopez had his best stuff today. In three innings-plus, Lopez gave up 11 hits and 10 earned runs. He gave up monster shots to Giambi, Sheffield and A-Rod and failed to get Jeter out in three at-bats. The AGU just asked me if he gets the rest of the day off to do what he wants. My answer: "Yeah, he's gonna go beat off on Lee Mazzilli's clothes." Which would be hot.


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