Wednesday, October 19, 2005

While You Were Sleeping...

...This nothing little storm called Wilma strengthened to a major Category 5 hurricane with 175-MPH winds, making this the most powerful storm in the history of the Atlantic.

This is the 21st named storm of the year, tying the Year of Our Lord 2005 with 1933 as the busiest storm season of all time. Wilma, the 12th hurricane of the season, is also the first storm to start with a W, but that's only if you don't count the global shit-storm started by a Dubya.

The 36-year-old Asian girl sitting next to me just looked my way and said plainly, "You know, I really hope it hits Florida." I kinda do, too. If you're a regular reader of this here rag, you know that I'm doing my darndest to cede Florida back to Spain. Like the Family Guy writers and the monkey in Chris' closet, I'll never let go of this joke. God, I hate that fuckin' place.

Florida Governor Jeb Bush pulled a Nancy Kerrigan, asking "Why us?" I'm left asking, "Why not you?" Seriously.

Slack Lede of the Day: EB is always on the lookout for funny journoshit, and this article certainly qualifies: "The author of a new state law that allows felony charges against owners of dangerous dogs was hospitalized over the weekend after his own dog attacked him."

Slack Link of the Day: The Saddam Hussein trial starts today, and I hope this one is cooler than the July 2004 one when everybody ended up swooning over the former dictator's new, sexy appearance (even Donnie). Today, Saddam had a little 45-second shoving match with the guards -- MPs, guard the Colonel -- as they tried to lead him out of the courtroom. Someone get TNT on the phone, 'cuz this is drama.

Slack Songs of the Day: Let's kick it classic-style today, swing the hips and shake the head to Mick and Keith and company, the Rolling Bears (bonus point if you aren't Evan or Hoobs and know what the Rolling Bears is from). Here are a couple of my favorites -- Shattered, Monkey Man, Loving Cup and Miss You.


At 10:55 AM, Blogger ethan said...

i saw some article the other day questioning whether saddam will get a "fair" trial.

seems like a rather stupid thing to waste time thinking about, no? i don't care how unbiased the jurors are, from what countries they're from, if he has johnnie cochran working for him - there's only one possible outcome to that trial.

At 11:17 AM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

A fair trial would be deciding not to hang this guy by his nuts.

I'd love to see him be acquitted. I don't know, I feel like the whole world would be different.

At 11:18 AM, Blogger jp said...

As long as the hurricane leaves my family in Florida alone, it can hit anywhere it wants.

At 12:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Wilma, the 12th hurricane of the season, is also the first storm to start with a W, but that's only if you don't count the global shit-storm started by a Dubya."

F'ing Brilliant. Well done.

At 12:38 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

Gee, thanks. Blush-a-roo.

At 12:57 PM, Blogger dhodge said...

The question is, do people become total d-bags before or after moving to Florida? If it's before, than we should hope for the continued existence of Florida to keep those people out of our hair in the other 49 states. If it's after, then yes, we need Florida to be wiped off of the face of the earth.

At 2:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...



At 3:28 PM, Blogger MDS said...

I don't think I read the article Ethan is referring to, but I feel strongly that Saddam Hussein should not have any trial at all. It's obviously just a show trial with only one possible outcome, so why have it? If we want the Iraqis to adopt a system that respects the rule of law, why start with a farcical trial? We attacked this country under false pretenses, and the sooner we stop all the false pretenses, the better.

At 3:33 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

AHAHA, Isles and Rangers...those were the days. By the way, the Rangers are awesome. That's me preview.

--Ken Baumgartner


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