Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Cheap Pops and Terror

Ninety percent of the blog-world will be tackling last night's State of the Union address today, and they'll either blindly praise the president and his speechwriters or wholly criticize its content, diction and delivery. I'd rather not add my noise to their noise.

Make no mistake, I'm a big part of the problem in general. But in this case, I don't have much to pile on. I'd only like to make one big note: I hope people are calling him out on what folks in the professional wrestling business call a "cheap pop."

That's when Mick Foley or some other beloved face comes out and, before launching into a verbal tirade, says, "It's great to be here in the great city of Cleveland!" That never fails to garner intense applause from the crowd and curry favor with the hometowners.

And the president totally employed the cheap pop last night. The Howard Finkel character announced his introduction, and a focused Bush strutted down the aisle slapping hands. I mean, would it kill 'em to blast "I am a Real American" as he did so?

He then stood right in the center of attention and immediately launched into his own cheap pop: Coretta Scott King's death. George Bush really does care about black people! Camera two, pan to the clapping colored congressman! Huzzah!

Let's move away from the speech but stick with one of last night's hottest topics: the war on terror. I spent about an hour or so looking through old e-mails my Yahoo! inbox right after work yesterday, and I found some absolutely classic missives from Slack LaLane co-founder Donnie Fiedler.

This excerpt came from an e-mail called "Your Dad," time-stamped September 18, 2001. Donnie lived in Austria that year, and thus he relied on his friends and family for first-hand reports of the 9/11 tragedy. And so a week after the Twin Towers fell, Donnie sent along this paragraph as levity at the bottom of an uncharacteristically somber letter to yours truly:

"I also have one more thing to share with you. Maybe Osama and his bastard friends aren't involved in all of this. Think about who hated the Twin Towers the most? The answer is obvious: the Empire State Building. It was the crown jewel of New York long before the WTC, and its importance was diminished in a skyline containing the Twin Towers. Now isn't it possible that the Empire State Building, twisted with 30 long years of rage and anger and envy, simply couldn't take it any more and ordered the attacks. It's something to consider, and I would be in favor of calling in a big ape to shake the building down."

I agree wholeheartedly. Who benefitted the most from the 9/11 destruction? Who now stands tall like the protector of New York? Donnie may be right, and maybe if we're all lucky, we can get him to start posting his thoughts around these parts more often.

Slack Link of the Day: Top Gun 2: Brokeback Squadron.

(Okay, that's good, but it's nowhere near as good as this link, which may or may not be safe work. It likely is, but I want to just make that disclaimer so I don't lose your valuable trust.)

Slack Video of the Day: Ladies and gentleman, the lockerroom celebration of your AFC Champion New York Jets Pittsburgh Steelers.

Slack Song of the Day: I tried to find some new bands last year, and one of the first new ones I stumbled upon was U-Melt, which rocked the Knitting Factory in early April to my delight. I haven't seen them since, but they'll be opening for Tea Leaf Green at the Knit in March (tix still available!). So here's U-Melt from New Year's Eve on Green Amber, Praise You, Red Star and Get Down On It.


At 11:49 AM, Anonymous en regalia said...

nice work with the U-melt'ers...

i think i am going to see TLG on friday nite in cleveland...we'll see

from the vaults of musak to share:

great vid IMO from about my fav musician on the face of the planet....well at least she and her tune are featured, there is more going on here:

but cowlings, as for a new band mayB you might like:

shit man too f'in long these links are.

f'in neophyte i am.

At 11:53 AM, Blogger ethan said...

the number/decibel levels of the sniffles made during cowher's prayer was astoundingly high, no?

At 12:36 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

I'm sensing a pattern here, ER...chick singers with some funky ass shit playin' in the back. Cool beats, thanks for sharin'. Man, YouTube is just the greatest site ever.

Cowher's a secret coke addict. That's gonna be splashed all over the Pitt press tomorrow.

At 1:26 PM, Blogger TJ in OH said...

Did we just get an Al Cowlings out of en regalia for the Ace Cowboy?! Sweetness, Peaches, I love it.

At 1:30 PM, Anonymous en regalia said...

did not think that throwing out the name of the best highway driver to mange to not get ticketed for driving under the minimum speed limit would go under the radar screen around here....

btw, can sumone teach me how to do that simple linking thing thatyou can simply click on...

such a noob am i

At 1:40 PM, Blogger Ace Cowboy said...

I'm AC, dammit! Trow, check your email, I'll send you a quick tutorial...

At 2:17 PM, Blogger TJ in OH said...

My favorite thing about Cowlings is how, while talking to the LAPD during the chase, I think he only initially identified himself as "AC," like he expected the dispatcher to be like, "Oh, it's Al Cowlings on the phone, everybody."


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