This Movie's Gonna Hit a Water Buffalo
The latest sign that Hollywood is completely out of ideas comes in the form of a wholly unnecessary prequel:
"The creator of Scrubs is writing and directing a prequel to the '80s feature franchise Fletch, and if he has his way, the show's star Zach Braff will take over Chevy Chase's title role."
Let me start by openly declaring that Scrubs is one of my favorite sitcoms currently on television, and I think Braff is a great actor. I enjoyed his performance in Garden State and he's a Northwestern alum. I bet he's sad about Randy Walker, too. So I like him.
But this is an atrocious casting decision and an even worse idea for a green light. Can you for one second see Braff pulling off the "I'm Frida's boss" repartee, the "Dr. Rosenpenis" dropping papers fiasco, the "Beatles' White album" line in the Records Room or any of the relationship dialogue with Mrs. Stanwyck? Terrible, terrible stuff. I'd even be okay with someone like Jason Lee or Ryan Reynolds, but Zach Braff? As philosopher GOB Bluth says, "C'mon!"
I can come up with three good movie ideas by lunch that would be better than a fucking Fletch prequel with an actor that shares very few personality traits with the original. Fuck, I'd rather see a movie about a farmhand who lives in the easternmost part of Illinois but commutes to work in western Indiana every day, as a result making him lose an hour every morning and gain one every evening, eventually causing him to go absolutely batshit and beat his wife and son and shoot up his office in a time-induced rage a la Jessie Spano. In the end, it's a feel-good movie about the dangers and joys of interracial marriages. Shit, write that down...that could work.
At this point, I can't wait for the Amazing Grace and Chuck prequel.
Slack Link of the Day: Ken Jennings does some Jeopardy! blasting, which is a lot more likely than KJ doing any finger-blasting.
Slack Recommendation of the Day: Donnie and I went to see the New York Cosmos movie yesterday. Quickly I'll say -- great story, stellar soundtrack, top-notch editing, soccer stars and good sense of humor. What more do you need? Go see it, Once in a Lifetime.
Slack Video of the Day: From the geniuses that brought you Super Troopers, check out this trailer for Beerfest. Can't say it looks hilarious, but I'm definitely seeing this flick opening day. I think I'm the one guy that actually laughed during Club Dread.
Slack Song of the Day: Today marks the 16th anniversary of the passing of a virtually unknown legend (how's that for oxymoronic?). Brent Mydland, the Grateful Dead's keyboardist for 11 fantastic years, died 16 years ago today of a speedball overdose in his home. He was an absolutely mind-blowing musician, though, and I've been a great admirer of his work for years.
So here's our tribute to one of the true greats, one of the true wooks, one of the true candidates to die in his 30s from a speedball overdose. If you really want the best, try 12/26/79's Shakedown Street, which I can't seem to locate online. In lieu of that, have some Alabama Getaway, Good Lovin' and Dancin' in the Streets.