So, Uh, What'd You Do Tonight?
Gary Sheffield's gospel singer wife took some time away from being urinated on by R Kelly in a series of underage threesomes to sing the national anthem at Yankee Stadium tonight.
Then the place erupted when an old Yank'um named Paul O'Something threw out the first pitch. Everyone was excited for playoff beisbol: ALDS, Game 2. The Stadium was buzzing, electricity brimming. A few minutes after scheduled game time, Hoobs the Michigander sent me a text message that included the shocking question "Delayed, yes?"
Delayed?! What delay? Wait a minute...um, there's nobody in the dugout or on the field right now. I called Hoobs. Fox told its audience to rent a movie and check back in an hour, maybe more. I surveyed the crowd: "Hey, so anyone else hear the game is delayed an hour?" Silence met my query. Oh shit, folks, there's the grounds crew.
The Great Inconvenience of 2006...what a night. I mean, it doesn't get much better than hanging out in a rain-soaked Yankee Stadium, being teased with the removal of the tarp, filing out with 55,000 other perturbed people at the same time, fighting through masses to ride home on the over-crowded subway, realizing there is NO way you can possibly attend the makeup game, then getting caught in a fucking douchestorm from the subway station to the apartment.
Ace is wet, Ace is unhappy...Hey, at least I saw Pauly O throw a screaming fastball to the plate tonight, the only pitch of the evening.
A Game 2 Diary in Pictures: The scoreboard at 7:30 shows no beisbol; the Hardcore Jews are ready for action (I believe "hardcore" is the actual religious branch); the rain comes down lightly, but it falls nonetheless; grounds crew workers cocktease the crowd and de-tarp the field; only moments later, they come back out to put the tarp back on; a couple of Matsuis don't like what they see; the scoreboard at 10:01 looks like suspiciously like the scoreboard at 7:30; finally, an announcement from the Yankees about tomorrow's game. Garbage.