A Pair of Durrrrs
Anyone else starting to feel like Eli Manning and George W. Bush are living wickedly similar lives right now?
I'll admit straight from the top that this analogy, like its creator, has a ton of flaws. Chief among them is the easy "stage of career" retort, which is an irrefutably valid point. Nonetheless, just look at these two guys and tell me they don't share a couple of dominant traits, not the least of which is a look of constipated retardation that conveys nothing but unfettered confidence in their abilities.
Both men come from good stock -- famous fathers, more capable brothers -- and were probably directed by the haunting of a family's legacy into their current positions. Each was talked into taking sweet can't-miss jobs with cool perks that suddenly turned to shit; Georgie wanted to be the leader of the free world, Eli a superstar in New York and man about town like Derek Jeter.
But along the way it went bad for them, mostly by their inabilities to effectively marshal the troops, and now it looks neither man wants to be in his own skin. Both convey that childlike "I don't wanna get out of bed, mom" look more often than a kid with a math test, and it looks as if each would trade in everything great in their lives to get the fuck out of the mess they're in cleanly and easily. Each, however, has preached a "stay the course" strategy with no tangible results to show.
You can just see the already dim lights inside them die a little more each day. Just watch the expressions on both their faces when they fuck up royally and tell me they're not cut from an eerily similar cloth. I don't know where one can find the cloth that you cut to get a retarded monkey, but its out there somewhere.